"I quit and I am taking Peerless with me"

With Christmas Season comes the usual array of Holiday Parties. Always a good time yet some people tend to drink way too much and all the secrets of the past year come spilling out like Britney Spears' tits during a wardrobe malfunction. Peerless' father once told him that more people get fired because of stupid things that transpire at Christmas Parties than any other reason. This statement is true for the most part. Peerless has witnessed wives of co-workers get into fist fights with other girls who the husband had gotten to know all too well during the past year. He has also seen co workers get into fights because someone is way too drunk and someone trying to playfully cut up the other person gets out of hand. Once, Peerless even saw a guy who was gay (nothing wrong with that) profess his attraction to a very horrified straight guy. Needless to say, the object of the Gay man's crush could not escape the ribbing that ensued until the next year's Holiday Party. (A disclaimer on the Gay incident- IT DID NOT HAPPEN ON THE TRADING FLOOR WHERE PEERLESS HAS WORKED FOR THE PAST 10 YEARS).

The best Christmas Party Meltdown Peerless Experienced happened in 2005. At that time, peerless worked for a group of guys who were (are) overall nice people. Peerless brought them Business and they paid him well for it. Therefore, was never going to have an issue. However, the fellow who worked with Peerless in the Sugar Options pit was rather disgruntled about his salary, etc. The day of the Party, Peerless and the guy go out before the Dinner actually starts and Peerless actually sees the other person double fisting beers and shots of hard alcohol. By the time the actual party (a sit down dinner at a high end Italian Restaurant in Tribeca) starts. Peerless' co-worker is absolutely shitfaced. While they were walking over to the party, the co-worker starts mumbling about how "so-and so" is a fat f$%k and for me to watch him because he is going to show me how to stick it to someone.

The actual dinner passes without incident but before the dessert arrives, the head of the company gets up and says he would like to make a toast. He starts mumbling something about how our company is the best and we had the best year and he is the best broker, etc. Peerless' friend gets up and yells at him in the middle of the restaurant, "If you are so (expletive) great then why can't you pay me a bonus more than $500". The argument gets played out very loudly by a bunch of drunk people in front of horrified diners and culminates when the co-worker announces "I AM QUITTING AND I AM TAKING PEERLESS WITH ME!!!!" At that point, everyone at the table (and other people in the restaurant) turn to me to see what Peerless will say. Peerless gets so flustered that he spits his wine he was drinking across the table. A big dilemma ensues: If Peerless just says he is not quitting, then he will totally make his friend look bad and he will get fired, if he says he is quitting, then not only does Peerless not have a job, but he also probably wont get paid for December as well. Therefore, he replies that he is SHOCKED no one in the company can get along and perhaps everyone can try to work things out instead of everyone getting fired, quitting, etc. Unfortunately, no one wants to work things out and a full volume disturbance erupts with the waiters bringing the check without us asking and them requesting that our company never go back to their restaurant. The argument between Peerless' friend and the owners of the company spills out onto the street and gets so heated that a full scale brawl is narrowly averted.

The end result of the altercation: Peerless' Friend gets fired the next day. The same guy also pukes all over the back of a taxi cab and almost gets in a Fight with the Irate Driver. Peerless tries unsuccessfully to get the Company's owners to reverse the firing. Peerless does not quit at that moment but winds up leaving 4 months later.

Peerless is actually very good friends with the Owner of the Restaurant. When he goes there with his wife, they actually joke about booking the upcoming Christmas Party at the same restaurant.

The Hall of Fame for Scrooge Type Bosses Peerless has worked for

Tis the season.......

No Blog on people in the Trading Profession would be complete without nightmare stories of former Bosses. Peerless wishes to state upfront that he has had the pleasure of working with some very honorable people in the Commodity Profession. Many of these people you will never hear about because they are Stand Up Guys (women) and never do anything sleazy. However, no one likes mundane news. Therefore, here follows the Hall of Shame. To those of you who might know Peerless in real life: Just watch it or you might find yourself here one day with a Sorbiquet as well (I kid- really) :)

It should be no shock to anyone that people (including Peerless) in the Trading Industry have some very big heads. It is fair to even say many of us succeeded because of, not in spite of, our massive egos. However, some people take things a step too far and instead of stepping over the line, chose to fly over it in a learjet.

#1. The Moyel- The Moyel, as you might have guessed by the name, was an orthodox Jewish person who gave Peerless his first opportunity on the floor. The Moyel was perhaps one of the most intelligent people ever to set foot in an options ring and is in fact the same person who made $1 million in less than 1 minute back in 1987 (see an earlier post). However, the only thing that rivaled his knowledge and ability to make millions was his hubris. Many a time, when young Peerless was learning about Options, he would get verbally assailed by the Moyel about his lack of common sense, stupidity, and even his looks. This guy was tough. The Moyel is also the person who hired the former Israeli Commando to work on the floor only to see the guy quit 2 weeks later because he couldnt handle the yelling and pressure the Moyel threw at him. Apparently, it was easier to run Clandestine Operations in the Golan Heights or Gaza than it was to take the abuse of this crazed individual.

Nonetheless, Peerless soldiered on (note the pun) for 4 years with the Moyel but "the Bridge too far" occurred when Peerless and the Moyel both went to London for a Business Trip. On the final day of the Trip, the Moyel got incensed at Peerless' lack of understanding the complexities of an OTC option. At that point, it somehow comes out that while Peerless was raised Jewish and even had a Bar Mitzvah, the fact that his mother was converted to Judaism somehow makes her not a real Jew and therefore neither is Peerless. So, with that info in hand, the Moyel now says that it explains why Peerless is so stupid. Since his mother is not a real Jew and Peerless shouldn't have even been Bar Mitzvah'd. Therefore, it totally explains to the Moyel why Peerless is so stupid.

Because Peerless isnt totally stupid, he doesn't say anything back or even Quit on the spot because he realizes he still needs to get back to NYC. However, the seeds of discontent are well sewn and Peerless thinks long and hard about the insult. It comes to pass that the Moyel one day fires Peerless because he feels he can get someone to do the same job Peerless does for Cheaper.

The end of the story is that Peerless winds up retaining all of the customers from the Moyel's Business and for the next 6 years, proceeds to stick it to the Moyel at every opportunity. Whenever Peerless would get one over on his former tormenter/boss, he would yell at him about how a goy was fucking him over. To this day, the cockles of Peerless' Heart warm whenever he remembers how he stuck it back to his former tormentor.

#2 Mr. Sympathy. In 2000, Peerless' mother had Breast Cancer and had to go through some very serious operations and chemo treatments. Needless to say, it was a very tough time not only for Peerless' mom and father, but also for him as well. One Monday Morning, Peerless takes a train from the hospital in Philly to the exchange in NY after learning his mom had a very bad reaction to the Chemo and was in grave danger of not living through the day. It just so happened that that day one of the Moyel's clients decided to give Peerless a hard time about undercounting him by 100 lots on a trade. Honest mistake and Peerless honestly shouldn't have been at work that day. However, "Mr Sympathy" just wont let it go and curses up a storm at Peerless and telling him how he will never get another order again because he is so bad, etc. By this point, Peerless hands the phone to the Moyel and actually goes into the mens room and cries for the only time ever in his career. When the Moyel explains to the guy what was going on and why Peerless was not 100% that day, the client actually responded back that he "didn't give a shit and to get someone else who could count correctly."

Peerless has never forgiven "Mr Sympathy" for power tripping that day. On a good note, his Mother is now a Breast Cancer Survivor for 9 years and for the most part doing well in her Retirement years. She has also never heard about this story until now (assuming Peerless' Mother is an actual fan of the blog).

3. "Miyagi-san" This guy wasn't a bad person. Peerless actually liked him. He was just unreasonably tough. Miyagi-san was the highest ranking black belt in the S Korean army in the 1960's and actually would get even with his drill instructors by breaking their arms or legs when they had to spar for Military Training. He never got in trouble because he would always explain it was a "training accident". Anyway, Peerless worked for him in the 1990's and everyone in the office was intimidated by him. He actually found Peerless an apartment 1 block from the office so he had no excuse not to work from 8am-10pm.

Perhaps he was a tough guy but he wasn't a real dick. A funny note is that 1 summer, Peerless had a friend who was an Air Force Academy Graduate working as an Intern. The fellow, who at one point was on the short list to get an F-16 turned to Peerless and said "That guy is the most intimidating 65 year old person I have ever met. He is a Monster."

Dear Miyagi-san, thank you for not ripping Peerless' heart out and showing it to him when he mentioned that you were the Korean Dick Clark.